It Could Have Been a Sports Car
by Darkwood Princess
Summary: Or why Sirius Black has a flying motorbike. Featuring annoyed!Remus and enabler!James. MWPP


**AN: So I just went to see the new Star Trek movie and my mind has been blown. Leading up to me seeing it though, I had to dive into another fandom to stop myself from finding spoilers for the other. Harry Potter was there to catch me when I needed it. This fic was born from some serious (don't mind the pun) binging on Marauder's fanfics. It's set right after they join the Order.**

As usual Remus Lupin felt like the only sane man in his group of friends.

Currently the four of them were standing in a muggle dealership, staring at the expensive, brightly colored cars. Sirius and James were of course glued to the models, excitedly opening and shutting doors, fiddling with the wheels, and, in the cases of the poor cherry red convertible and purple sports car, honking the horns to see what happened. Peter had wandered off to the vending machine, probably to buy a couple dozen bags of his newest addiction: Cheez-its. Remus was going to have to remind his slightly tubby friend that those were unhealthy. Peter wasn't much help either way though, and Remus was going to have to remind the starstruck Sirius and James that buying a car was not only _not_ in the Order's budget, but a bad idea in general.

You know, considering that none of them could drive.

"I think this one'll do." Sirius had found the most expensive car in the entire showroom, an electric blue Beamer that fairly reeked of speed and disaster. Remus knew he had to set his foot down now or forever regret what his reckless friend would do with a motor vehicle.

"You're kidding Padfoot. We're not buying a car with the money Dumbledore gave us for the Order's groceries!" Nevermind the fact that Dumbledore had accidently given them too much gold. The money they had converted to muggle cash was burning a hole in James' pocket. "And besides," Remus continued, "it costs waaaaayyyy too much and is far too flashy." Sirius looked crestfallen but brightened as a thought hit him.

"But we could use it to blend in with muggles! All those stakeouts we go on would be so much better. They'd be a breeze with a beautiful autofobile!" Remus facepalmed.

"Automobile."

"Whatever!"

Next to Sirius James was nodding sagely and running his hand along the car's body. His eyes held that wistful look of someone who had found a shiny new toy and was going to do anything to get it. This was bad.

"What part of bright blue and fancy says 'blend in'! You just want it to pick up muggle chicks and Prongs, for the love of Merlin, don't even think of buying him this." Adult James had the same mischievous grin as teenage James, the smile that screamed 'I-will-make-your-life-miserable'. He had been surreptitiously reaching for his wallet to count the money they had exchanged gold for at Gringotts.

"Besides," Remus pleaded with his friends, looking at the small vehicle, "it won't hold more than 4 people, let alone enough to be of use!" James shrugged and Sirius pondered for this a moment.

"We could fit five if we shoved Wormtail in the trunk," James offered thoughtfully, glancing at their friend who was still hitting up the snack machine. If James thought they could fit the overweight Peter in the tiny trunk of this…

Sirius however looked as if James had just solved the problem of world hunger and turned his large dark eyes back on Remus. "Please Moony! I promise I'll share! We can even get you a girlfriend with ole' Sheila here." He patted the car fondly. Remus felt himself flushing.

"You can't name it, naming it only attaches you to it, and I don't need a girlfriend, we're in the middle of a war!" He hissed at his oblivious friend, knowing that unless he distracted him soon they were going home with a vehicle none of them knew how to use. Glancing around, his eyes lit on a stand of motorcycles. Knowing that they were going to buy something in this accursed dealership, Remus pointed out a stand of shiny new bikes to his friends.

"Wouldn't you want something more practical like a motorbike? At least you can hide it and it's much more maneuverable." His voice took on a pleading tone that his friends were far too familiar with. James, who could care less what they bought as long as they bought something, contemplated the bikes and, turning to Sirius remarked, "You know Padfoot, girls like badboys on motorcycles too." Remus didn't know whether to sigh in relief or groan in frustration as Sirius's eyes lit up and he dashed over to the bikes, muttering something about leather jackets and flying charms.

Explaining to the Order's head that they had bought a motorcycle along with the groceries was a lot easier than explaining away a shiny sports car. (It helped that Dumbledore secretly loved bikes).


End file.
